Sunday, October 08, 2006

Tender Love (Invitation to Offer)

Why not try this and see, I say.

If you are a girl in her 20s, beautiful (beauty lies in the eyes of a community of professional men, like the Bolan test for medican negligence), fair-skinned, slim, educated enough to be presentable but not enough to intimidate, with a smile that could melt a heart and harden a dick depending on the context, a virgin ofcourse (yeah, even a kiss-virgin), a nice decent girl who doesn't mind sharing a home with me and my parents, please respond with 2-3 closeup photos.

No dowry unless ofcourse your father doesn't want to send you emptyhanded on such a big event of your life, given that if you have male siblings they will not take care of him in his old age if they find out you have a good chunk of his will.

High caste (kayastha and above), not manglink (they husbands die early, evil bitches), someone OK with my keeping numerous friends of opposite sex who will call when they need me (that's what friends are for, and I will always be there for them so know this ok)

Please I will prefer don't be from legal profession and even if you are don't be from the Bangalore law school coz those women have too much attitude and too little makeup, and they have all had thirty-thirty boyfriends each. And they think it is fucking feminist to make jokes like karvaachoot for karvachauth. Also, it will make me insecure though it was just a stupid entrance exam and I was 17-18, too busy watching Karishma Kapoor films.

Also, you should hold a job, MUST hold a job. But this is only coz u will have to give it up. I would rather marry a woman who GIVES up a job for me rather than someone who doesn't hold a job, coz that feeling is very good no, that sacrifice. Anyway after 2-3 children any woman from decent family with values will want to take care no.

Please fast for me today in anticipation-better to study for some entrance test you are half-thinking of taking no, be on safe side- it is Karva Chauth.

If you are from south India, please be from that city/caste where Aishwariya or Hema is from, no other.

I have started an anonymous email ID called bshareen@gmail.com. I know it is a girl's name but I am not gay like Sylvie but secretive like James Bond.
Please invite me to Orkut-and to any parties with a cool crowd also.

4 Comments:

Blogger The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

LOL. this blog is hilarious. bloghopped over here and enjoying it.

9:28 AM  
Blogger The Happy Lawyer said...

Thanks. Can I see your photograph? Prefer one where you are smiling a lot then I can see if you have straight teeth. Please don't send if you already have a boyfriend or enough emotional baggage that you are a Coolie No. 1

4:04 AM  
Blogger The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

What's in it for me?

8:54 PM  
Blogger The Happy Lawyer said...

Games. Games are fun,no, liek XBox? Like, see how I replied to the above comment of yours after a week?

9:41 PM  

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