Friday, July 20, 2007

Diet

I am on a secret diet. It seems too pansy-type to like, say, oh-I am dieting. It is like fasting to get a good wife (which I only did once or maybe max twice-thrice) coz I don't want to be paying alimony and for her brother's foreign education and what not.
Anyway now I am hungry so I will eat an orange and also arrange some biscuits around the desk by throwing them loosely on the table. That way noone will suspect.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

HappyAss.

There are other things you could consider too. Stop smiling entirely. Like never. No exceptions. RealMen are not affected by anything. You could let a sardonic gleam flicker past ur eyes sometimes but that it. NO SMILING EVER.

Also like Nana Patekar said, no killing mosquitoes. Seriously. i know thats sacrificng a lot in delhi, but what to do. Its a difficult road to be on ..the ReMan (like rehab).

Hmm..what else. Yeah, No Speaking to Girls. They are lower beings. Even if they are office mates. Email was invented for a reason you know.

Also you gotta avoid tea ..there's something effeminate abt it.

Oh, and join boxing classes somewhere. Pugilist ears/skills! The girls will fall like ninepins (not sure if i intend the pun).

You don't shave (too often) do u? Also u gotta sign off mails with 'cheers' or 'enjoy'. I'd love to write 'Floss' but then i'm a girl and write crappy stuff only :((

Also u mustn't ever agree with girls, which means u shouldn't agree with any of this. Hmmm. what a conundrum.

10:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hilarious comment. hats off...you know...the kind i might wear when i get picked up by a british firm from this sweaty bombay office...

i love this blog

12:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon, you said no speaking to girls.........what about speaking to partners, the managing partner, the assistant managing partner, the wife-in-charge managing parnter, the gay-pet-tax-boy-cum-librarian-to-the-managing partner, the secretary-to-the-managing partner-who-thinks-he's-managing partner, the partners, the ex-partners, the partners-sexual-partners, the partners wifes, the partners-wife's-sexual-partners...???...any consideration here??..or does this blog serve the purpose...

4:26 AM  

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